Grapplers Ediquette

     For anyone who grapples, you all know the frustration of grappling with the "newbie" or MCMAP guru that doesn't understand basic grappling courtesies.  I have rolled with way to many people who break these simple but VERY important rules.  Who would have though something as simple as bathing before coming to class would be such a hard concept for some.  So I have devised this list of common courtesies or rules if you will for the inexperienced and inconsiderate grapplers.  Sadly I have seen or experienced each of these and some even on multiple occasions.  I pray that this will somehow make its rounds and even becomes a brief for young military members that aspire to be grapplers.  So please read below and adhere to these listed.  If you have more please let me know, I would love to add to this and make it easier for all of us.  thank you

1)Just Tap
    None of us are unstoppable, so that means that eventually and even often you will lose.  So please TAP OUT when you are caught.  Don't be the guy who wants to hear his arm pop before he gives.

2)Pride
   Kind of like the guy who never taps no one likes the proud guy.  He doesn't tap either, when he gets a hold he doesn't let go, and when beaten he throws a temper tantrum.  We aren't 6......please don't act like it.  You will get beaten and it will probably be by a skinny unassuming guy.

3)Bragging
   Don't walk into a class and brag about how awesome you are and how you can take anyone.  If you do this don't expect any leniency, where as if you came in humble and said I don't know anything people would have been nice to you.  Once people have figured out you lied they will only torment you more.

4)Bathing
   Who would have though something so simple would be so foreign to people.  If you have had a long day at work please don't come to  class smelling like it.  Even if you cant smell it trust me your feet and butt do stink.  Somewhere in the night I will probably be close to both of them, so please bathe.

5)Clean Clothes
   Along with bathing clean clothes are important.  After bathing please put on NEW clean underwear, yes we will be able to tell....and that's gross. :(

6)Breath
   If you just ate something with garlic or haven't brushed your teeth in a day you probably should freshen up.  No one wants to smell your breath after that.

7)Nails
   PLEASE trim them.  Even as I write this to you I have a 6 inch scratch across the back of my neck from 2 days ago.  No one likes walking around looking like they got into a cat fight.

8)Skin 'Problems'
   If you have skin 'problems' better known as ring worm, staph, MRSA, athletes foot, or anything else gross.  Please don't come to class with that.  I have caught all of the above because people decided it was ok to use the mats at the gym with their skin 'problem' and I came in behind them and used it.  Its serioulsy NOT cool.

9)Slamming or Suplexing
   Where as it may look cool in a movie or an MMA match even, it is not cool in class. I am your friend I do not want to be paralyzed because you REALLY didn't want to get caught in that arm bar.

10)Fish Hooking
    As insanely dumb and wrong as this sounds I have seen it.  Please do not stick your finger in my mouth or nose to maneuver my head around.  Not only will I attempt to bite your finger off but this is just unsanitary and unsportsman like.

11)'Softening Blows'
   Someone thought it would be cute to teach this in the MCMAP program for Marines.  Where as it may be ok in MCMAP its not ok in Jujitsu!  No one wants an accidental elbow to the groin or an intentional one to the inner thigh.  Please just no striking at all....

12)Pressure Points
     To go along with the previous 2 please don't try out any cool pressure points you saw in a kung fu movie once.  I don't want your fingers dug into my jaw or armpit.  Lets just stick to basic Jujitsu and not make my Lymphoids swell.

13)Shave
    Where are beards are cool, but if you plan on using it as a weapon then shame on you.  I have seen guys who will actually use their 5 o'clock shadow as a weapon to scratch up and irritate their opponents face.....not cool.

14)Flailing About
     No one likes to get an accidental slap in the face...or other parts of their body. If you don't know what to do don't make up for it by flailing around like a tornado of slaps and eye gouges.

15)Leg Locks
     If you are a beginner or are really forceful with submissions, please spare everyone the chance of a broken leg and don't do leg locks.

16)Forcing Moves
     To go along with the leg locks, please do not force a submission. If the guy doesn't want to tap or you don't have it in good enough, don't make up for it with brute strength. Its better to lose than to rip a guys arm out of socket.

17)Grinding
     We aren't in a death match and you don't hate me.  So please don't grind your elbow into the back of my neck or spine or face or anything else for that matter.  No one wants to grapple you if you are going to do that.

18)Fingers
     Fingers + Eyes = why do you hate me?  When grappling please do not push my face away with open fingers in my eyes, or stop the takedown with them.  It hurts...

19)Eye Contact
    This isn't a romantic date, and I am not going to call you afterward. So please save the awkward prolonged eye contact for someone else, we don't need to have a 'moment'.

20)Drooling
    No its not just babies that do it, and yes I have seen it.  If you are tired and feel like you are going to vomit please excuse yourself and walk away.  I don't want your drool.

21)Tap Out Shirts
    If you are wearing one you might get picked on.....just sayin.

Wife Appreciation Post

     Today's topic is going to be a little different from my usual posts.  Today I am writing my "Wife Appreciation Post".  No Airin did not high jack my account and no this isn't some cheesy way to suck up or apologize.  Will it earn me brownie points though?  You betcha!!! 

   
    Isn't it funny how easily we take things for granted?  Think about it, we go around day in and day out with cars, houses, friends, your spouse, clean water, and so on.  I could get into how most of the world doesn't have these luxuries and we are so blessed but that's an entirely different subject.  The point is that we take soooooo many things for granted until we can no longer enjoy them.  Right?  When  you have a car you use it and will even complain about how dirty it is or how crappy the AC is.  But as soon as you don't have that car and you are walking to work, what do you say?  "Man!  Wish I had my car!!!"haha Such is the case with me here.  Obviously I knew I would miss my wife while I was deployed, but to what degree?  I miss my mom or dad or even my dog but that still isn't the same.  So here on deployment I have compiled a list of reasons as to why my wife or even wives (you can use some of these reasons later now) are awesome, and why I appreciate her.  These are not in order by rank (because when you rank things wrong it can come off wrong, like putting cooking abilities about personality...not cool) they are just simply listed as they come to mind.

1. Airin is with out a doubt my best friend.

    Lets start with the corniest and mushy one shall we?  While it is cool to hang out with the boys and be in guy time 24/7 and always go to the gym and be manly.  She is still way cooler.  Honestly I have yet to meet a guy who can beat me in arcades, and gocart racing, go rock wall climbing with me, go spelunking, and hiking up a castle all in one day and still smell good and be beautiful.  Sorry guys but she is just way more epic.  There isn't anything that we can do together and not make it fun.

yea I know...hot right?

   2. She is an unlicensed gourmet chef.

   For those of you that know her and have had the privilege of tasting her amazing food know what I am talking about.  Like I have stated before, I would wrestle a 2000lbs rabid cyborg bear with lasers for eyes and a black belt in Gracie Jujitsu for a taste of this amazing cuisine.....and that's dangerous.  I didn't need any affirmation or reminder before leaving home that she is an amazing cook.  But being out here and eating at the chow hall EVERY day has squashed any doubt that could have ever arose that she is a culinary master. 

Eggplant and Goat Cheese Pizza with Pesto Sauce

  3. She is by far a way better roommate than a guy.

   Lets face it guys stink!  We smell like sweat and feet, most guys don't clean up after themselves, they snore, they fart in their sleep (and awake), they involuntarily grow things in their laundry or food closet that looks like it came out a SciFi film, and they are loud!  Airin on the other hand smells like lavender and Escada Rockin Rio, which is quite delightful.  She cleans up her messes....and mine, she never snores, she does our laundry before it starts to grow things, and she is quiet unless she has just seen a bug in the house.  While my stuffed animal dog that mom sent me may not get mad at me and yell mean things at me when I punch it in my sleep like I do her (by accident, I am so sorry).  She is still better to room with, she is quite wonderful to say the least.

You wont see flowers in a guys room.

   4.  I can get away with doing semi-homo things with her.

   One of the wonderful things that I found out when we got married is that I can use all the girly stuff I want and its not considered gay at all!  Think about it, If you use girly body wash and your friend sees it he will either call you what?  Gay or married.  Lets face it, girls body wash is way cooler than guys.  When you get a pedicure (yes I have...twice) you are called what? Gay or married.  I can watch chick flicks, use girly soaps that smell good, use the pretty exfoliating face washes, and use nose strips.  But here needless to say its not as fun.....

   5. She likes me for me.

    Not only is this a cool song from the 90s, but it is also one of the best things about her.  She is the only person in the world that I can go on and talk for hours with about anything and everything from God to what town would you attack if you were a giant squid....yes that was a real conversation we had.  I am not the coolest, funniest, or best looking guy in the world, but she seems to be pretty into me....and that's pretty darn cool if you didn't know.  At work I might have to juggle responsibility while balancing on one foot in front of "The Man".  But with her I can just be me, no need to impress, no antics or drama, not Sgt Owen, not the Caveman, just be Chase.  Thank God....

These are only a few of the hundreds of reasons to appreciate her but I don't think anyone wants to read all of that.  Honorable mentions are:  She is GORGEOUS, shes an amazing photographer, shes the best co-op partner in any video game, she is an amazing driver who doesn't feel the need to road rage it on up, she is my hero when it comes to technology because I suck, and she named our dog Optimus Prime.  To sum it all up I am going to steal a description from a wise little boy who once wrote a letter-

Airin you are:
'more awesome than a monkey wearing a tuxedo made out of bacon riding a cyborg unicorn with a lightsaber for the horn on the tip of a space shuttle closing in on Mars, while engulfed in flames'.

and that makes you pretty dang sweet!